Wednesday, March 3, 2010

"Just Wanted to Say"

When one begins a sentence with the word "just" or throws it in in the first few words of a conversation, they may as well be saying "anything following is total bull%@#t".

"Just checking in..." No you're not! You are really saying "I haven't heard back and it's been an inappropriately long time, so I want an answer now!". "Just wondering...." Again, I want to know and feel like it will bug you if I come right out and ask" or I want to ask you out and have to preface this by saying I was "just wondering what you are doing Saturday night" to avoid the embarrassment of rejection. This is an easy way to let someone come up with an I'm busy excuse so you never have to ask in the first place. "Just Do It", Nike's very popular slogan is even a bit passive aggressive. Why not "Do It!" or "Do It Dammit!", "Get Off Your Ass"? The Just in the sentence makes it less of a command and more of a "come on, please?".

Think about it. We all do it. Have you ever met a person who is so insecure or nervous about what they are trying to convey that they say "just kidding" after EVERY single sentence to the point it's distracting? I feel like when one begins every thought, question, request, email, etc with "just saying.... or just wondering......just wanted to say......" is a key strike away from becoming that "just kidding, just kidding, JUST KIDDING!" guy!

Try saying what you mean next time and see how good it feels to be direct. Being more genuine, sounds more genuine, obviously and will put the other person at ease rather than the opposite. Again, think about it when you want to start a sentence with just and check yourself. "Is this a bunch of crap and do I really mean something else?" Communication people! (that's a whole other rant)

~ Kate


  1. I totally do this! I always say, "Just calling to chat" when I get a good friend's voicemail. But I say that because I really don't have anything exciting to talk about and you don't have to rush and call me back.

  2. There are many legitimate uses of "just". I rant about this subject because I annoy myself with my overuse of this word, not because other people bug me so much. Just calling to chat is legit, so carry on! xoxo